Did you know that Epilepsy Awareness month started on November 1st? Many of you won't think twice about it being anything other than Thanksgiving month. For our family, we don't need a special month to be aware of Epilepsy. Our lives have been consumed by it since December 30, 2006. That was the day that C-monkey was diagnosed with Infantile Spasms, a catastrophic seizure disorder (not a muscle spasm as many think of when they hear the name). Our family has been affected mentally, physically, emotionally, & financially by Epilepsy. A day doesn't go by where we don't feel the after effects of C's brain being ravaged by years of seizures. I see a lot of folks on FB posting something they are thankful for every day starting on November 1st, so instead of this being a sad post about how hard life with epilepsy can be blah, blah, blah...I'm going to post the things about Epilepsy that I'm thankful for. Didn't see that one coming did you?
Because of Epilepsy:
~I've met some of the most incredible people. People that truly love my child. People that have embraced our family with open arms. People that have helped me fight when I just wanted to give up. People that prayed for, cooked meals for, & supported us through the really hard decision of having brain surgery. People that I've never met in person, but have met through this epilepsy journey because they too were traveling the same road. They have virtually held my hand & given me valuable advice.
~I've met some of my bestest friends because more than likely they have children with special needs too. They get my wacky sense of humor. They know that I have sad days, & that sometimes it's sad weeks. They get the emotional roller coaster I'm on during birthdays or periods of transition. They are ok with me being myself & dropping the BS because "ain't no one got time for that".
~I understand that it could always be worse. I've seen families on all ends of the spectrum.
~I'm more thankful for the little things. When C ate some goldfish crackers the other month (his first crunchy food since surgery), you would have thought he had just slam dunked on Lebron or discovered the solution to the deficit. I was THAT proud! In the same respect, I'm so incredibly thankful for each new milestone that baby bug accomplishes. A lot of them that C never accomplished or did really late.
~I don't sweat the small stuff (well, not as much as I USE to!). Yes, my house is a wreck sometimes. Laundry sits on my love seat for a few days longer than I'd like. There are more important things in this life than making sure my house is spotless at all times. I don't want "her house was never messy" on my tombstone. I'd much rather it say that I was a good mom, wife, daughter, friend, etc.
But more than any of that...on November 1st, the start of Epilepsy awareness month, I'm thankful for the 18 months of freedom we have had from the seizure monster! I'm thankful for the new skills that C monkey is learning, now that his brain isn't being ravaged multiple times a day by seizures. I'm thankful for the great reports I get from school now. The videos from his awesome speech therapist of the amazing things he is doing that I never thought possible, but always hoped! The joy he gets from his very first best friend-his baby sister. I'm thankful for bear hugs, giggles that speak volumes, & the way he expresses that he wants our attention by touching our noses. I'm thankful that I'm a good exhausted from happy things instead of worn down from starting our day with seizures & sadness. My kiddo is my hero. Hands down. Every day.
As great as all of this is, & it's pretty damn great, I want to always be AWARE of epilepsy. For the families still fighting. For the families starting the fight. For the families that have lost the fight. For us as we fear of it returning, because we were never promised this freedom, but for some reason it was our time. For THAT I am thankful. Eternally grateful.
